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Blame It On Homeschool

I’ve come to this point in my life where I need something to blame.

I mean, I’m almost 30, so I can’t blame my issues on the fact that I’m young. I can’t say, “Oh, I’m just a kid, so I don’t know how things are done.” People just aren’t buying it anymore.

And I can’t blame it on lack of awareness of the culture. You know, like, “Oh, we just moved here, so I had no idea.” Because we’ve moved like a bajillion times, and really every place is the same. They all want you to pay taxes and get your car registered and that stuff.

I can’t blame it on my kids. I can’t use the excuse, “Oh, I’m not going to make it. You know, with little kids, it’s just so hard.” My kids are both in school and they don’t really tie me down much.

So yes. I need something new to blame. And I’ve got a great one.

I’ll blame it on being homeschooled!

I was “schooled at home” from Kindergarten through my senior year of high school. So you know I’m a total FREAK of nature. I might as well cash in on that. For real.

Whenever I can’t pull it together, from now on I’m going to explain, “Oh sorry. I was homeschooled, you know.” If I have an etiquette faux pas, I’ll say, “I was homeschooled, so I wasn’t sure what was appropriate in this instance.” When I can’t remember what year the Revolutionary War was or how many States are in the Union, I’ll just blurt out, “Homeschooler, right here!”

I could even use it for stuff that’s non-homeschool related, because most of the adult population was not homeschooled. They have no idea the reason I’m unable to light a pilot light has NOTHING to do with my elementary education.

It will take a little bit for me to settle into this new excuse pattern, because most homeschooled kids spend their formative years trying to NOT act like a “homeschooler.” So to boldly blurt the secret out at every opportunity is going to be foreign to me. But I think I can adapt. I learned how to do that in homeschool.

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