Questions

Annoying noiseYou know how people say, “There is no such thing as a dumb question”? I guess that’s true. But man, my kids ask some annoying ones.

OK, I’m not the most patient mom ever, so maybe they get under my skin too easy. But, like every day? Do they have to ask the same question every day?

I can’t even sort these by level of annoyance, because they ALL kill me.

What are we doing tonight?

They barely get their legs all the way in the car after school and they throw this one out. The introvert in me wants to scream, “You’ve been DOING stuff all day! Why in the world don’t you just want to go home and sit on the couch?!” They’re kind of scared to ask at this point, but it still doesn’t stop them.

“Mommy…” They squirm for a bit, while I say, “What? WHAT?!” repeatedly, waiting for the conversation to go somewhere.

Finally they quit wiggling and blurt out, “Are we going anywhere tonight?”

“Gahhhh!” is normally how I reply. So they try texting Daddy, hoping he’s more easy to wear down.

What’s for dinner?

I hate this one for two reasons.

First, most of my recipe names mean nothing to them. If I say “Ropa Viaja,” or “Southwest Turkey Sliders,” they don’t even know what I’m talking about. So it’s a pointless question, leaving them with no more information than when they started. Typically I just say, “Meat in sauce with some salad.” And they say, “UGHHGGHHGH.”

Which leads to my second complaint about this question. It’s basically an excuse to fuss about how much they will hate dinner. And since they don’t know what “Carnitas” is, they’re just ASSUMING they’ll hate it. I find it demoralizing. Like, you just assume my food will be bad?

Why are you cleaning? Is someone coming over?

I know I’m not the best housekeeper ever. But is it really that bad? Sometimes I just sweep because there is dust and puppy fur in all of the corners. You don’t have to get ugly about it.

But really, this is more of a painful truth kind of question, because usually someone is coming over. I just work better under pressure, OK? I probably would have done some cleaning, guests or no guests. It’s just happening a lot faster because I only have 2 hours until someone knocks on the door.

I know they’re not going to stop asking, so maybe I need some pre-printed cards with answers to these questions:

  1. NO!
  2. Food.
  3. Just. Don’t.

 

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